Regular Degular Horoscopes

May 2021

MARCH 20 – APRIL 19 
Aries
Aries
MARCH 20 – APRIL 19 

Stop referring to YouTube in every debate. 

APRIL 20-MAY 20
Taurus

How you say sorry for everything EXCEPT when it's actually needed? 

Taurus
APRIL 20-MAY 20
MAY21-JUNE 20
Gemini

Stop skipping your belly button during showers...

Gemini
MAY21-JUNE 20
JUNE 21-JULY 22
Cancer

The emphasis on Hot Girl Summer is the word "Girl"- You a grown ass WOMAN. 

Cancer
JUNE 21-JULY 22
JULY 23-AUGUST 22
Leo

Stop ordering Tik Tok Starbucks drinks, ain't no one got time for "grande hazelnut, 3 pump, upside down, unicorn's blood frap

Leo
JULY 23-AUGUST 22
AUGUST 23-SEPT 22
Virgo

It's not a salad if it has more dressing, cheese and bacon than lettuce. 

Virgo
AUGUST 23-SEPT 22
SEPT 23-OCT 22
Libra

If you are over 35, Fashionova is not your friend. 

SEPT 23-OCT 22
Libra
OCT 23-NOV 21
Scorpio

Take the chance.

Do it. 

Scorpio
OCT 23-NOV 21
NOV 22-DEC 21
Sagittarius

It's been 6 days since he hit you up about another date, let it go. 

Sagittarius
NOV 22-DEC 21
DEC 22- JAN 19
Capricorn

It's not "cooking" if you just heating it up. 

Capricorn
DEC 22- JAN 19
JAN 20- FEB 19
Aquarius

Keep going, things will happen eventually. 

Aquarius
JAN 20- FEB 19
JAN 20- FEB 19
FEB 19- MARCH 19
Pisces

No disrespect, but at 37 you have to STOP blaming your parents divorce on EVERYTHING. 

Pisces
FEB 19- MARCH 19