Finger Snap Series Presents: A Poem.

The Final Nightmare

It’s “time” I gasped

What about time, my dear?

It’s passing so fast,

Yet it is so unfamiliar

Well, what are you going to do with your life?

Aren’t I already doing it?, I countered

But next, what are you going to do next?

It’s on the tip of my tongue, I can feel it

So go go go for it!

If I go for it too fast

Then it will be all-consuming, it will be it

...then it will be over

The chase

The challenge

The wonder


Ah, I’m beginning to see why it’s so hard for you to keep love, my dear

No person, place or thing seem to hold your attention for long

Can’t hang onto my nouns, I snickered

Really my dear,

You must commit to one thing, become an expert at it

...you can’t live this way

I worry for you

I live to live in the moment

It slows me down, grounds me

Makes moments move slower...gentler

Not fleeting, more precious

The stopping to look down and feel your pet’s paw clenching your hand kind of living

I want more musing about the universe

About what it would take to live on Mars

The intricacies of a neuron

And the capabilities of us as the electrical beings that we are

I want to communicate with animals

Connect with the earth

Observe the subtle ways in which we all behave alike

And the differences in experiences

That tear us apart

“That’s not the way life is”

You need a big house, a large yard

To fill up rooms with fine goods

Bear children, grow a family and teach them

Teach them what? The same cycle?

I’ll never even look at any of it

All my belongings will get set up “just so”

Like an Architectural Digest photo shoot set

A large Swiss Cheese Plant in one corner

A caramel-colored leather couch

Well-loved, colorful books on display

And I’ll feel proud for maybe a day…

Over time more and more will naturally be added

Then my heart will slowly sink

Until it’s all filled up and so heavy

With all the wrong substances

I’ll start to be out of the house 22 hours a day

Whether in reality or my sleep

You’re being dramatic

...Then empathy must be a stranger to you

Maybe you’ve forgotten how it feels

Or maybe you were always dead inside

Blindly following the so-called steps of life

Otherwise, you’d understand how...how...

It kills me to even imagine a future

Where every day is set to be the same

The walls, the actions, the problems, the expectations

And I wake up 50 years from now,

Only to introduce me to myself

The version that you wanted

But I can’t seem to wrap my head around

-The Final Nightmare

Heidi is a poet, writer and comedian residing in Raleigh, North Carolina. She loves to travel, indulge in numerous outdoor activities and explore the human mind through the lens of a cognitive and social psychology educational background. She can frequently be found sprinting to make it to places on time, dancing out of boredom, and drinking excessive amounts of Americanos.