5 Things to Help You Go After Your Dream
Do you have a passion you want to turn into your profession? Do you feel like the “traditional” route of school, college, degree and a 9-5 is not for you?
That is awesome. I am rooting for you and your accomplishments.
How do the people in your life show up in support for your dream? Do you ever feel like other people’s opinions are holding you back?
I hope these five things can help you shift to better position yourself for the support and encouragement you need (and deserve).
First, it is important to understand that your support system does not automatically equal your friends and family. We want to think that those who are closest to us are the ones who are going to support us the most, but that is just not reality.
The first thing is to make peace with that, and the rest of the steps will become easier as well.
1. Gather your support.
Friends and family are oftentimes too close to the center to see the big picture. Instead of seeing your vision, they want to “look out for you”. In addition, they may or may not feel that your choices will affect them directly, or by extension, so now they are “looking out for themselves” as well. And that is okay. We can not change the people around us, but instead we must find ways to adjust and do what works for us. Anyone who makes you doubt yourself or your plan for how to live your life and go after your dream, are not support system in this part of your life. Stop sharing your dream with them. The trick is in finding who in your inner circle can support you with an open heart and an open mind, with the ability to put themselves aside and cheer you on fully. And if you have none, go outside of your circle and make new connections with people who can.
2. Pay attention with intention.
Many of us have people in our lives whose company we do not enjoy. It can be for a few reasons and if these are people you are bound to spend time around because they are in your family, or they are working at the same office, I hope this will help. Be picky with whom you pay attention to. Here is what I mean by that. In a group of people where you can choose who to spend time with, be it a party, a work get-together, or any scenario where you are not forced to speak directly with someone, beyond greeting and polite small talk, put your focus on and seek out those who you do have a mutual connection with. Let the rest be background noise. This is important overall, to protect your own energy and motivation. Pay attention to whom makes you feel good, motivated, inspired, and light-hearted. Pay attention to whose presence drains your energy. And adjust your focus accordingly.
3. Know your why.
It really is that simple. Yet, it can be everything but simple. Oftentimes, our why is deeper than we think. What is your why? What is the statement, the desire, the reason that will motivate you to accomplish your goal? What will help you stay on course, stay focused and keep pushing forward? The reason to know your why is that once your reason can be detached from you, or rather from your ego, by pulling it out and being able to define it, the motivation to accomplish the why can outweigh the fear of judgment from others. Having a clear definition of your why can also help you find your people, the ones who share your view and who align with you and your why. This is not always an easy one to execute, but I would say it is necessary. And the key to remember here is that your why does not have to be big, it just has to be yours and come from your heart.
4. Follow those who already did.
Would you go to the lawyer and ask medical advice? Would you approach the motivational speaker for advice on real estate? No, you would go to the doctor for medical advice and the realtor for matters of real estate. Extremely logical. So, when it comes to your dreams, your plans, and your ventures in life, why are you going to people who have not done what you are aspiring to do? Seek out the people who can be of guidance, those who know it is possible and who can not only encourage you but are willing to help you with advice and tips and tricks. You can find them on social media, in random conversations and by attending events that have to do with your area of interest.
5. Share wisely.
I cannot tell you how many times I have shared something I am super excited about with someone and I get a flat reaction back. I cannot tell you how many times I have seen someone share plans and dreams out loud with friends or family, only to get shut down by questions, concerns, and red tape. My advice? Do not share your dreams and plans with everyone. In fact, be really picky with whom you share it. Among all the people you know, maybe a handful might be able to push you and give you the encouragement you deserve. Share with them. By sharing things with people, you are essentially giving them permission to have an opinion about it. If you want to avoid remarks, questions and comments that will get in your way of pursuing your dream, know who to share it with.
These are all things that I have learned the hard way, by doing things the opposite way and have it blow up in my face. Or rather push me down and robbing of the confidence to even get started. If I can spare someone the need to re-inventing the wheel by going through it themselves, I am here for it.
For many years I held myself back, scared of what people would think. Countless times, I have shared ideas and dreams with people who were not able to see my vision. I can’t tell you how many times I have granted people permission to have an opinion on some aspect of my life that I don’t need their advice on. Far too many times I gave room for self-doubt and limiting believes.
I started shifting a few years ago. I have done each of these things myself and with that I have shifted my energy and the way I interact with people.
And from there, I have gone on to start a blog, create a podcast, record videos sharing reflections about life on social media, putting my writing out for the world to read, and am currently working on a book.
What all that boils down to is making my passion part of my life, showing up for my dream and vision and growing a confidence I could have only dreamed about just a few years ago.
It all comes down to knowing and accepting that we cannot change other people, but we can have full control over how we interact with other people in most situations. Where and on whom we chose to put our focus is entirely up to us. We can use that power to our advantage.
You got this!
Amanda is a writer and motivator at heart. She is a translator, blogger, podcaster, and content creator, who is driven by connection with others. In 2018, she founded This Adoptee Life, a blog that has since grown into a platform and community for adult adoptees. Via This Adoptee Life, Amanda shares openly from her own life and experience as an intercountry, transracial adoptee born in Colombia, taken to Sweden, who has chosen the US as her home. This Adoptee Life is a place where adoptees can explore their story, share their experience and speak their truth, in support and community, with each other and the world.
Amanda is currently working on her first book, based on her own life, with the purpose of guiding others.
If you wish to connect with Amanda, and the work she does, adoption-related or not, you can find her via the links below:
Podcast (Apple Podcast): https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/this-adoptee-life/id1588073614
General Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/realamandamedina